Valentine's Card

It has been awhile since I received and sent a Valentine's card. At this day and age...as my boyfriend pointed out...sending one is out-of-style. I told him, "...nope...in my world, its still in style..." Hence, our exchange of Valentine's greetings. My boyfriend is not the romantic type but as he pointed out aptly, he is the affectionate-type. I believe him...we come from a province known for people who are affectionate and sweet. I was happy receiving his Valentine's card....to receive a part of him. To know that this is not just a virtual relationship. That we can still be with each other...since ours is a long-distance relationship.

Now, we are at the point that we ( or he) arranged for us to meet...at last! All of a sudden, he brought up the question....whether I was sure that I want to be with him. I suddenly thought....is that question for me or for him? He reassured me that it was for me....and that he was looking out for my welfare. I guess both us are thinking of both the past and the future. The past....wherein we think of things that could be. The future....thinking of things that could be. That is a bit confusing....even for me! It's really just anxiety and worries....innate expectations of couples. No matter how many times we say that there will be no expectations.........there will always be unexpressed expectations of each other. He worries...I worry. Despite that I am still excited to meet him...and make that decision...to be together for the rest of our lives. That is scary but he seemed sure that he wants us to be together til we grow old. For me, this is refreshing since I am used to come-what-may-relationships. They were good relationships...kept me on my toes and I have learned a lot about what to do and not to do in my future encounters. It actually made me want to stop having this kind of relationships!

But every year Valentine's day comes....it makes me ask myself...is it a good idea to be with someone to celebrate this day? My answer seems always to be Yes! So here I am...exchanging valentine's again...hoping...wanting...loving!